1st times

Tonight was an interesting one, I would say. Really, its interesting.
Because its my first time:

• I went out with the some of the teaching staff of PKSSSS till late (kind of fun larh, though it was 'business'. We went to a Thai temple to chant mantra. I've only been to other temples with my family. Going to another temple for night service is a new experience. And of course, I've got company till 8 plus. Yeh!)
• I went to buy fruits and veggies (I run errands for mommy and daddy from time to time, but this time around, the food I bought were for my consumption only. Life has changed. Its kind of wierd though, I think I bought more food than I would usually buy for the ENTIRE family.)
• I cooked the food I bought (It has to be some REALLY special/crazy occassions when I cook myself/my family a meal. Its either I woke up on the wrong side of the bed that day, or My parents were busy/away. And when I cook, I'm kind of like a chef, take food from fridge, cupboards etc. -- the foods that moomy and daddy bought larh, basically. I had NEVER cooked the food I bought. Not until today.)
• I decided to do my homework without being forced to (ONLY Mama's nags and daddy's 'Guodong, when are you going to get your stuff* done?' Punishments from school would NEVER get me to even look for the school bag I chucked aside the moment I returned home. NEVER. Its kind of peculiar right? Sometimes, we just 'grow up' when we miss our family. I bet I would revert to my old self when they return. haha!)
• I SLEPT LATE because of homework (HAHA! I think I have REALLY gone mad! Homework would NEVER be my reason for sleeping late. Given that sleeping is my religion. Even extremely interesting television programmes also couldn't make me stay up! And today, homework IS my reason for sleeping late. I think I must be mad. OR, maybe I was mad and now I'm cured. What's happening? I really don't know.)

People change. But it always seem so surprising to realise that you have changed; and that you are no longer the person you used to be. And I'm still quite stunned. HOMEWORK?!!! How on earth did it EVER bypass my ultra-hightec homework blocker?! $%^&*! haha! Hello, new me!

Tick - Tock -Tick - Tock

The rhythmic tickings of the analogue watch at the airport was an indication of their nearing departure and my unwanting independence.

Grandpa and grandma were there, but the tickings were never soft. And they NEVER stop.

Breadfast was a silent one. No one had the appetite. Who would anyway? But I ate, because mom insisted. She knew I wouldn't eat so she made the you-better-eat-your-meals long distance call.

I've never said goodbyes to my brother and sister, and neither did they. But now we have to. This feeling is so foreign.

We bid our farewells as they left for the departure terminal, waved our goodbyes and mouthed our well-wishes as they dragged their feet to the departure gate. Gate 32.

My brother messaged his farewell and I replied. Our texts were formal. The language both of us despised, mocked and laughed at together. And today, we used it. Maybe it serves as a reminiscence of the funs we had together. Those were the days. The days when we were still young. The days when we were still together.

Tick-Tock-Tick-Tock. The dreadful sound at the airport has now become a melodic one because it reminds me of time passing and their imminent return. The gambler and his stakes -- My family.

Then again, this constant ticking signals the never pausing time and the coming As that I've NOT prepared for.

I want time to pass by quickly so that I can see my family again but I want time so slow down to a craw so that I can catch up with my preparations for As. This really is a dilemma and for now, I have a big big house for myself to allay this misery.